|Bridgwater International Cup losing Senior team|
The bad news started when it became apparent that self-declared 'star player' Councillor Smedley pronounced himself temporarily unfit and within several minutes was asleep on the touchlines.
|Enter the Dicky|
Never mind. Time and Sandino waits for no one in particular and so off they went. 3 Slovaks and 2 Brits kicked off and within 14 minutes had lost 5.1 to Dynamo Henleaze. Meanwhile on the adjoining pitch, the Juniors still hadn't turned up so their first game against St.Werburghs Hotspurs was lost by default.
And so it went on, until finally Dicky and the 7th cavalry arrived. Bridgwater Juniors clinched a sensational 1.0 victory over Real Madras and Bridgwater Seniors held the mighty Arno's Vale Academicals to a 1.1 draw.
But then it all turned to shit and they all lost the rest of their games finishing bottom of their respective groups, now with the prospect of playing each other in the supplementary competition for losers the Shit TrayTrophy.
Sadly it wasn't to be. The Juniors went down several nil to the Easton Cowboys and the Seniors went down at least 3.0 to Red Star Bedminster.
|Man of the match, Steve 'no goals' Miles|
On the positive side, much money was raised for Nicaragua, chimichangas were eaten and enchiladas donned as inappropriate headgear, whilst on the negative side one Bridgwater player was banned - although we're not sure whether this was for hitting someone or for not hitting one particularly rubbish referee.
STOP PRESS;- SENSATIONAL 'MATCH FIXING SCANDAL' INVESTIGATED.
Shortly after the tournament finished with the surprise and frankly pathetic defeat of both Bridgwater teams, for who the organisers had to invent a new category of 'more than last' , revelations as to the role played by two apparently innocent and apparently female 'supporters' of the Bridgwater side present on the day. After extensive investigations by our team of experts and his mate Dave, it was shockingly revealed late last night in a kebab shop that the two nominally innocent 'groupies' were in fact multi billionaire Russian oligarchs working for the neo Stalinist Red Star Bedminster team who are currently in the pockets of top Putinista bathroom fittings magnate and UKIP donor, Frodo Tokalotashajt.
|former KGB 'match fixing' operatives at work|
Answers on a postcard.